The Four Flavors of Gossipers

04 Jun

Gossip DisherThe one who is always dishing out any gossip they can, be it fact or fiction.

Gossip Receiver: One who listens to any and all gossip they hear, often perking up at the mere thought of gossip.

Bi-Gossip: One who listens to all gossip going around and also spreads gossip at every given opportunity.

Hypocritical Sneaky Bi-Gossiper: The sneaky bi-gossiper both listens to and spreads all gossip they hear, but they pretend not to be into gossip at all, not to be two faced, and worst of all they twist what they hear, adding sordid details and omitting anything that’s of an innocent nature.

The Neither-Nor: The most rare type of person of them all, the one who is disinterested in gossip all together, not wanting to hear or repeat any type of gossip about anyone.

Face it, the greatest majority of people on the planet love to gossip, sad as it is, it’s true. Some people don’t care if their stories ruin lives, ruin relationships, careers, it just doesn’t matter, what matters most is how juicy and sordid the story is. Every now and again you find that rare personality in someone that does not like sitting around bad mouthing other people, in fact, they abhor it, but as I’m sure you well know, it is rare indeed.

The worst type is the one who states that they do not gossip and don’t allow others to do it around them: they are closet gossipers, sneaking around stirring the pot behind everyone’s back. Still worse is that they change the stories around, adding a pinch of adultery here, taking away a good deed there, and all for effect! Always working behind the scenes in their attempts to keep up the facade, never owning up to the fact that they are in reality, a sneaky hypocritical bi-gossiping trouble maker.

While there are those who mostly just listen to gossip, and those who run around spreading it, most people are true bi-gossipers, equally listening and spreading everything they hear and create around. The question is, when is gossip just juicy stories one hears about a neighbor, and when does it become something darker and much worse? So and so got kicked out of church for being at the local bar, it’s big news in a small town. What about when someone jealous of someone else makes up a story that they were caught with another man or woman, or someone makes up a story that someone else is beating their child up, or someone is stealing company funds at work? These things aren’t idle gossip, these stories can ruin lives and the B.S.’ers don’t stop to realize these things before they go around town spreading their B.S.

The Neither-Nors are truly the most rare people out there and it’s a shame there aren’t more of them, they mind their own business and keep to their own lives. Perhaps they have experienced the damage that gossip can do, or they just aren’t into hurting other people, whatever the case may be, I think that we can all learn a lesson from them.

I know of a woman that makes it her aim in life to gossip about all of her neighbors, all of her acquaintances, even all of her own family members! I passed along a small tidbit of gossip recently just to see how long it would take her to repeat it, she even surprised me, it took exactly 24 hours and the story was passed along! While I know her to be a huge storyteller, I must admit, the speed of her version of the Telephone Game was record-breaking. It’s extremely disappointing, but not at all surprising.


Posted by on June 4, 2014 in Personal Stories


2 responses to “The Four Flavors of Gossipers

  1. Jen

    June 6, 2014 at 3:30 am

    this is sooooo true! I think we all know someone like that sometime in our life. you hit the nail on the head! Im probably totally a bi-gossiper but I try not to be like hurtful or anything when i do so I dont know if im as bad? lol anyway this really resonates with me because i had a friend do somthing similar recent where she got mad at me so she was spreading alot of lies to my bff and coworkers and almost got me fired bcause of it so its cool that I found this. I kind of want to send her your post lol. i so would but i feel like she would drama up your page!

    I totally wish I found you sooner, i read thru some of your recent posts and youre so funny. 🙂 i dont really like to post comments usually but I just really wanted to tell you Im def a big fan of your blogging style! Ill be back for sure 🙂

    • thesmartcritic

      June 6, 2014 at 7:09 pm

      Hi Jen,
      Thank you for reading my post and feel free to pass along the link if you’d like, I’m not worried about drama God knows I’ve encountered enough of it since I started blogging. I think that if someone were offended by that particular post, it would only be because they were guilty of being all of the gossip types! I know the type you refer to and that’s what I mean by people not being able to realize the difference between idle gossip, and the kind that negatively affects peoples lives. Sorry that you’ve had to deal with the type up close and personal. Please feel free to stop again and comment all you like. Thank you.


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